Introducing pet names/nicknames to a relationship
Do you think pet names need to be discussed by a couple before throwing one out there? Does that take all the magic and whimsy out of it?
I've almost called my s/o a nickname of sort (not "babe" or something generic, but something more specific to him and his name) a few times — we've been together about 6 months — but have held back because I worried it would come off weird. (In turn, he's called me by a nickname he knows I don't really go by, and I don't mind that much... so he probably wouldn't either.)
Nicknames/pet names definitely create a sense of intimacy I think that you don't feel like an absolute CREEP doing out in public (unless you're Lindsay Hubbard from Summer House who was calling that random guy Ahmed "Babies" within like one week), but it can be awkward to introduce into a relationship.
What do you guys think? Have the convo about it or just say it and overanalyze the reaction for weeks on end?
No discussions! They should just happen! I once called my partner “plumkin” which was not met with approval bc it sounds like plump. But it still gives me a laugh!
I love taking an inside joke and making it a pet name. While I’m in a relash with someone calling them by their name for too long feels weird. Also if this is a judgement free zone I loved Bubba with Katie and Tom
OK for the sake of an example — HYPOTHETICALLY... what if like his name is Bobby, and I just called him Bob. It's more convenient for me (IT TAKES A LOT OF TIME TO SAY THAT LAST SYLLABLE) and it's just For Us. LOL (No one else calls him that.)
That's my more specific example... just calling him "Babe" or "Hon" out of nowhere would be insane to me now that I think about it.
I think it depends on the origin of the nickname. Like, for example (a bad one, but an example nonetheless), if you eat pop tarts every morning and he's like, "I'm going to call you pop tart," then you're off and running. Both parties understand the in-joke, and as long as you laughed about it the first time, then you're good.
But if it's out of goddamn nowhere, or it's a generic like "babe," I think a conversation absolutely must be had. 1/2
My husband called me “babe” once about one month into dating, and it stopped me in my TRACKS. I think I said, “don’t ever do that again,” not because I hated it, but just because I was so thrown off by it.
Fast-forward ten years later, and we have no pet names together. I think that moment had something to do with it.
So, a DTPN (Define The Pet Name) convo is essential, imo. Otherwise, it’s downright shocking.
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