The internet has been abuzz the past few days as fans of Sex and the City (now rebooted as And Just Like That) witnessed the unfortunate events surrounding Mr. Big and his evening with Peloton. It’s probably unnecessary at this point to state this, but if you’re planning to read any further, there is one helluva spoiler to come. This is your last warning. Okay, here we go.

Big is dead. Yes, after a particularly rigorous pedal party with the fictional “Allegra,” played by real life Peloton instructor Jess King, Mr. Big ambles to the shower and enters cardiac arrest. It’s a tragic twist for the reboot’s first episode. (Although not as tragic as Carrie’s lack of emergency instincts — CPR? 911? Glass of water?)

In the spirit of the show’s unofficial tagline, I couldn’t help but wonder: Maybe things would have been different had Mr. Big taken a class with a different instructor. Maybe he’d still be alive! Maybe he and Carrie would've had a lovely weekend in the Hamptons. Maybe Peloton wouldn’t have had to issue a variety of statements and wink-wink videos?

The following are my predictions of how Mr. Big’s night would have ended had he taken a different class.

Christine D’Ercole

If Mr. Big had simply taken a Christine class, he would have been totally fine. First, she would have lulled him into a gentle cadence with a forgotten Dave Matthews jam, then empowered him with an inspirational Evanescence track, and ultimately, led him into the weekend with tales of her latest bike race.