Let's "Unpack" The 'Bachelor' Season Trailer, Shall We?

- The Bachelor -
Let's "Unpack" The 'Bachelor' Season Trailer, Shall We?

Matt James proved himself to be quite the eligible Bachelor in the Bachelor season premiere on Jan. 4, and based on the promo for the upcoming season, it looks like he might really be a winner after all. Breaking down The Bachelor's newest Season 25 promo, it looks like Matt will have one of the most dramatic seasons yet, by no fault of his own.

The Bachelor season premiere introduced frontrunners, like Abigail, and potential villains — I bow down to Queen Victoria (seriously, I'm afraid of what she'll do to me if I don't). It also introduced us to Matt's favorite phrase: "Unpacking things." And through it all, Matt seemed like a very competent (and, yes, hot) Bachelor. But, if the promo for the rest of the season is any indication, it looks like Matt will have a tough time navigating the cocktail parties ahead, thanks in large part to the drama cooking up between the contestants.

Apparently 32 contestants wasn't enough for Matt. And just when you think he's forming real connections, a new group of women comes in to turn everything upside down. There's tears, there's gossip, there's an escort (?), and, of course, a literal fist fight, because we can't have nice things! Let's break it down shot by shot.

Matt's Showering Saga Continues

Matt continues to come for Colton Underwood's Bachelor Shower King title, this time with bonus points for an outdoor shower. Is this the new Bachelor staple? All men must be ready to shower for the camera! Anyways, if we are judging Bachelors based solely on who we want to watch shower, Matt is as good a Bachelor as any!

A Wedding Dress Date

Please excuse the photo quality, it was either this or a very blurry shot of the women running to Matt in wedding dresses. Following in the footsteps of Tayshia and Zac's wedding photo date, it looks like Matt will be getting a sneak peek at his future wedding — assuming he gets engaged at all.

Matt's Many Bachelor Adventures

One thing Matt's Bachelor promo makes very clear: he's a daredevil. He loves activities. Horseback riding, ATVs, car racing, sky diving, zip-lining, hot air ballooning — he does it all. I will spare you the pics of every single activity, and instead just say that if a man asked me to go sky diving on our first date, I would take my little rolling suitcase and hop into one of those black SUVs, never to be heard from again.

Matt Makes Out — A Lot

Much like his date activities, Matt doesn't discriminate when it comes to make out sessions. He's making out everywhere — on the hood of a car, in a hot tub, at a cocktail party. Here he is making out in the woods.

And then again making out in the hot air balloon.

Thank Chris Harrison for all that COVID testing, am I right?

A Conversation About Race

Both Matt and the Bachelor franchise want us to know that they are very cool with interracial dating. "I do acknowledge color in every sense," Rachel tells Matt in what looks like either a one-on-one or a "can I steal him for a sec?" moment during a cocktail party. "At the end of the day, love is love. It doesn't matter what it looks like." (Let's hope the conversations get a little deeper than this.)

Serena P. Is Falling

After a shot of what looks like Serena P. making out with Matt under the rain, the promo cuts to a clip of her laying it all out on the line. "I definitely could see myself falling in love with you," she says. So we know things are moving fast.

New Arrivals

And then the real bombshell drops: after "weeks" of getting to spend time with Matt, the women are shocked to find a few new limos pull up to the Nemacolin Resort. As Queen Victoria herself says, "Who the fuck are these random ass hoes coming into the house?"

The Drama Begins

The new arrivals aren' wasting any time. One new arrival in particular is definitely looking for trouble. It looks like she gets out of the limo and goes straight for Matt's lips. Talk about an entrance.

This same woman — whose name is currently unknown — proceeds to walk into the cocktail party and declare, "They just wanted to save the best for last." The very definition of "not here to make friends."

The Escort Rumors

Rumors quickly fly around the that one of the women is an escort. "I've heard two different terms going around. I've heard 'Sugar Baby' and 'escort,'" says one of the women (Katie, is that you?) in the promo. Matt flat out denied that the woman in question is a paid escort, but told Entertainment Tonight that he's "excited about getting to the bottom of that."

This Face

I'm very OK with this reaction, whatever it may be reacting to.

Heather Returns

Heather Martin, from Colton Underwood's season, rolls up to Nemacolin and is met by Chris Harrison at the gate (lol). "Heather, what are you doing here?" Chris says. "You could honestly destroy this whole thing for Matt." Now, it's unclear what history Heather and Matt have, or if they even know each other at all. For his part, Matt seems totally surprised that Heather is there, but he's not displeased. "I feel like I'm in a dream right now," he tells her.

Of course, the other women competing for Matt's heart aren't so welcoming. Heather's arrival actually has one woman in tears, sobbing, "You already had your fucking shot at a Bachelor, like, go home." Yikes.

Serena C. vs. Katie

More drama is coming courtesy of Serena C. and Katie, when Serena accuses Katie of starting "little fires everywhere." The conversation ends in a screaming match and Katie telling the camera, "I don't give a shit what she has to say to me." Who is the villain here? Is it Serena? Is it Katie? Is it me?

The Actual Fighting Begins

Honestly, when will The Bachelor give up on boxing group dates where they force contestants to physically harm each other? The answer is: not soon enough! Two women step into the boxing ring in the promo and, based on the next shot of an ambulance, it does not end well.

Granted, the ambulance could be there for a completely other reason. Never forget when Peter Weber cracked his head open on a golf cart!

The Primal Scream

Quick cut to a couple women at a cocktail party releasing a primal scream, which, honestly, sounds like a pretty excellent idea. I'll BRB.

The Crying Begins

"I'm about to explode," one woman says over a montage of contestants exclaiming frustration to the point of tears. "I'm dying to talk to him," another woman laments. And the contestants aren't the only ones crying. Matt himself is shown getting pretty emotional, evidence that the relationships are getting real.

Matt's "Jump The Fence" Moment

In a climactic moment, it looks like Matt is considering walking away from the entire show à la Colton Underwood fence jump — just kidding! He just needs a breather, and he doesn't want to do it with Chris Harrison, who joins him sitting on the curb and asks him if he's OK. "No," Matt responds. "I'm not sure where we go from here, I just need some time," he adds before getting up to get some air.

In a confessional, Matt says he's afraid of being vulnerable, "because it opens up this place that scares me." Matt, whose parents split when he was young, doesn't want to risk repeating the cycle. "I don't want to put anybody through that."

Matt Contemplates His Future — Shirtless

He contemplates his vulnerability and relationships shirtless. No shower this time. Progress!

The Final Rose

At the end of the promo, it looks like Matt is ready to propose and give out his final rose. He's got the ring, he's got the suit, and he's got a romantic set up that makes it look like he's in Arendelle from Frozen. The only thing he needs is a fiancée.

And that's everything you can expect as this season of The Bachelor continues. I would say you should get ready for a wild ride, but, I get the feeling there's no preparing for Matt's journey.

Image: ABC/Craig Sjodin

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