Two old men from Chicago walk onto a beach. That should be the subtitle of this season of Bachelor in Paradise. Because somehow, with their old man from Chicago vibes, Kenny and Joe on Bachelor in Paradise have become the hottest commodities on the beach.

I don't mean to be ageist (can one even be ageist toward one's own contemporaries?) or Chicago-ist (my editor is from Chicago, so she'll check me on that), but Joe Amabile and Kenny Braasch are, in fact, older than most people in Paradise and they are very much from Chicago.

It took Joe consulting with Kenny about Demi during Episode 5 for the realization that these are the same type of man to hit full force. But I guess I should've seen this coming. They're both defined by their professions (even if Grocery Store Joe no longer owns a grocery store). They're both from Chicago, Ill. They're both the old men of the beach. And Kenny's nephew apparently loves Joe, so their connection is on a blood level.

I am not from Chicago. I've been there once. So no offense to any Chicagoans out there. But look at these factors and tell me that Grocery Store Joe Anthony Amabile and Boy Band Manager Kenny Braasch are not the same.

They're From Chi-CA-Go

Their accents do all the speaking for them on this front. If Kenny had not been on my screen when he uttered, "It's my first one-on-one date in Paradise. It's my first one-on-one date ever," while on his date with Tia, I would not have believed it was him. In fact, I'm still not confident Joe didn't provide the voiceover for that statement.