'Aline' Is An Unofficial Celine Dion Biopic, But An Official Dream Come True

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'Aline' Is An Unofficial Celine Dion Biopic, But An Official Dream Come True

France beats us in many key categories. There's the cheese. There's the wine. There's the bread. But there's not the movies. Like, that is our thing. Motion pictures, along with crab cakes and football, are what we do best. And nothing illustrates this quite so perfectly as the trailer for Aline, a French movie based on the life of Celine Dion.

The unofficial biopic of a movie, which is a full-length feature film making its Cannes Film Festival debut this week, was released in France in November 2020, but many of us are just learning of it now. Which is a shame, because this is definitely something that would've been great to discuss at Christmas dinner. (All we had was the Hilaria Baldwin scandal, and even that was too controversial.)

I would've loved to sit down at the table to discuss the following hot topics of Aline.

  • NUMBER ONE QUESTION: How did they afford to pay for the rights to Celine's music, but they couldn't use Celine Dion's name? What is the budget for this thing?
  • Is watching 57-year-old Valerie Lemercier play a tween Celine progressive, or unsettling, or?? Discuss.
  • If you were the filmmaker, how much time would you dedicate to Celine's biggest sleeper hits, "I Drove All Night" and "A New Day Has Come" and why is it 45 minutes?
  • How many goosebumps did you get when the first few bars of "I'm Alive" starts playing as the trailer begins, and why is it 45, which is the exact number of minutes that should also be dedicated in the movie to the song itself?

A production company might distribute Aline in the United States and when they do, I hope Alamo Theaters are still doing that thing where you're allowed to rent out an entire theater because this, mon ami, is a French classic that deserves our buttery, soda-sticky American hands to be all over it.

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