Being “the planner” in a friend group is very stressful

I am a capricorn through and through, so I love an itinerary. “Going with the flow” is simply not in my vocabulary. I don’t understand how people can just travel somewhere without plans or an agenda or research, I don’t understand how people can’t walk into a restaurant without a reservation… I just don’t get it. 

My friends and s/o know this about me and we always joke “major cap energy coming through” but the truth is, it’s a lot of pressure. People always expect you to find the best restaurant and get the itinerary in order, and to basically be the assistant to their lives for however much time you spend with them.

In a way, I enjoy it, because that’s how my brain functions, but there are other times it’s truly exhausting to know that everyone is relying on you.

For example, I was out with my girlfriends the other day for happy hour. I made us a reservation at a hard to get into place and we were having so much fun. Then, someone was like, “should we migrate somewhere else?” and no one… NO ONE made any suggestions or moves to find that somewhere else. And so I asked “sure, where do we wanna go” and everyone just looked at their phones blankly waiting for someone to take initiative. That person was me, who then spent the next 15 mins silently scrambling to find another place to go that had a table so we wouldn’t be just standing around waiting for one.

Am I the only one this effects? It's exhausting to be the planner of a group and mama's tired, y'all!

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