'Summer House' Recap: I Hate It When My Sharks, Friends, & Family Fight!

- Summer House -
'Summer House' Recap: I Hate It When My Sharks, Friends, & Family Fight!

Normally I start my Summer House recaps off with a cute snarky little intro, maybe a quick run down of what happened last week, but you guys, I can’t contain myself. We have to just get into Thursday night's Season 5, Episode 9, "Should I Stay Or Should I Go" right away. IT'S THE LUKE/KYLE FIGHT.

I'm just going to stream-of-conscious this shit because there's a lot going on. First of all, the face Kyle makes when Luke Bobby calls him a pussy sends a chill down my spine. That is the face of a man who is drunk but also ready to whoop some Minnesota ass. Luke kicks in the door like the Beast looking for Belle in some forbidden corridor.

Carl at one point, in his undies, chases Luke out of the house. Amanda is trying to tell Kyle to calm down… while wearing lobster glasses. Lindsay is still Doris and wearing her costume. Carl then decides it’s time to go to bed. We see producers scrambling. There seems to be Blair Witch Project-type footage of Luke in the woods talking to more producers. It’s TV gold.

“I keep my friends close, but my lumberjacks farther away,” is something I need on
my tombstone. Kyle is in full-blown testosterone driven mania, Carl is also angry and then says another amazing quote, “I will make a necklace out of his fucking hair and then resell it to his dumbass.” You guys, I would die for Carl. But you already knew that.

Luke is walking around the premises talking to this cute little English producer,
telling him that he’s not staying in the house while trying to grapple with
whatever the fuck just happened. This is all happening while they're all in costumes. Which, is my favorite thing ever.

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