Have you ever noticed that Kevin Keller is one letter away from being "Kevin Killer"? And what about how, of all the Riverdale residents, he's the one who remains the mostly clothed? I never gave either of these facts a second thought until Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa shared a behind-the-scenes photo of actor Casey Cott's "swole" physique, specifically teasing big things for Kevin in Riverdale Season 5, Episode 8.
To truly understand the meaning of this image, one must look at the caption. "Well, here's one spoiler for what happened during #Riverdale's time-jump: Kevin Keller got hella swole," Aguirre-Sacasa wrote in part. "Both Kevin — and @caseycott — are KILLING IT this season. The world is not ready for Episode 8." That was followed by the showrunner's now trademark string of emoji clues. But before we get into the emojis, let's focus on the message and why we're "not ready" as a world for the eight episode. Let's dive in.
What Is Kevin Doing After The Time Jump?
It's important to note that the caption confirms that this scene takes place after the 7-year time jump, meaning Kevin would be around 25 here. Assuming he isn't shirtless in the first 7 episodes, this whole thirst trap suggests that Kevin's beefed up body is a part of his character development. This is a particularly intriguing choice considering Katy Keene established that a future Kevin would be teaching drama at Riverdale High. Not exactly a position that would require a six pack. So either Kevin's been working out for kicks, or he's got a more dangerous side gig going on. And, as much as I hope it's just him taking over Archie's boxing gym, I fear there's something more sinister at work.
Is Kevin In Hiram's Mobster Sauna?
The water droplets, the hazy lighting, the tiles, it all looks pretty familiar. If Kevin is stepping foot into the sauna where Hiram makes all his mob deals, whatever has him so strong can't be good. And here's where the emojis come into play.
The collision emoji (or BAM, if you prefer) followed by the muscled arm seems pretty self explanatory: someone's fighting or gearing up for a fight, which could lend credence to the theory that Kevin has been working out at Archie's gym. (He could definitely be a drama teacher and boxer on the side.) The eyes also add to this theory — he could be gearing up for a boxing match that people will watch, perhaps to win the heart of someone he loves. The tornado is a bit more of a puzzle, but what really interests me is the second to last emoji here: the two men (one white, one not) holding hands.
OK, this is where things get weird, and technology appears to have failed me. As of 1 p.m. PT, when I open this post on my phone, I see the two men holding hands emoji. However, when I open the post on my computer, I see this:
While the emoji sequence of two men together holding hands vs. a white man shaking the hand of a not-white man might seem pretty similar, to me they mean different things. Two men holding hands, well, that could just be Kevin and Fangs. But, two men sharing a handshake, coupled with the fact that Kevin is definitely in Hiram's sketchy sauna would mean something completely different. Is Kevin about to make a deal with the devil? Or, as some Reddit theories have suggested, has Kevin been darkside all along? there's a popular theory that Kevin is the Season 4 voyeur, which means he could have been working with Hiram in some capacity. (There's no way Hiram doesn't know about all the criminals in Riverdale, right?)
Then again, maybe the emoji difference is just an operating system bug. Or, maybe Aguirre-Sacasa changed the emojis in between the time when I opened Instagram on my computer and then, minutes later, on my phone. Is this just a glitch in the Matrix? Either way, just seeing Kevin all buff and walking into Hiram's lair sends a chill down my spine. #ProtectKevinAtAllCosts
Image: Jack Rowand/The CW