Bringing back some excitement to my pandemic marriage/husband
I’ve been married to my husband for about two years. (Together for 4 total years, got married Jan 2020.) Keep in mind, we’ve been married for two pandemic years, which honestly feels like 80 normal years. I’d be lying if I said that those years haven’t tested us. Thinking about what our first years as a married couple could have been like… traveling, enjoying our 30s, and experiencing new adventures around every corner — I feel like they were stolen from us (I know that sounds dramatic, but I truly feel that way). And it has made me pretty resentful.
I’ve also become resentful of my husband himself. I feel like in those last two years he has lost all excitement and has become so complacent. I KNOW the pandemic had a huge role in that, it made all of us the athleisure versions of ourselves. No shame there! But, I feel like once we were married he just kind of agreed that we were going to enter into the old married couple mentality immediately, without the desire to seek out all of those opportunities we once loved. (I’ve talked to him too about his mental health and he has regularly seen a therapist for years, so I feel pretty good that it’s not solely pandemic depression or something like that.)
I get that you grow with people and life’s priorities change. I really do, and I can’t wait to do that WITH my husband later on in life. I also get that the pandemic has made it hard to just hop on a flight to Italy, without more than one week’s notice. But, I’m also just not ready to shut down my life and subscribe to evenings of cold leftover pizza every day for the rest of time. (I said the other day, “Let’s do a fun mexican dinner and make homemade margs and tacos and fajitas on the blackstone!” and his answer was “why not just go to taco bell 🥲”. I want to inspire him to want more and I’m not sure how to do this.
TL:DR; how do I reinvigorate my husband post-covid (whatever that means)?