Here's What Happens When You Pay An Etsy Witch To Cast A Love Spell For You

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Here's What Happens When You Pay An Etsy Witch To Cast A Love Spell For You

We are on year two of this goddamn pandemic and to say things have gotten weird is an understatement. I've been single for most of it and navigating this new COVID/post-COVID-ish world of dating has been tricky, which... has resulted... in me ordering a love spell from an Etsy witch.

Yes, you read that correctly. I, a relatively logical 29-year-old woman ordered a love spell off of Etsy. I never thought my life would come to this but here we are.

Being single in my late twenties for the majority of this never-ending COVID nightmare has not been the Sex And The City rom-com fantasy that I envisioned, where in a non-virus-panicked world, I would sit at a bar after work in my casually sexy outfits and wait for Matthew McConaughey to come scoop me up with some perfectly acceptable cheesy line. Instead, I'm on dating apps looking at vaccination statuses, and depending on the answer, I swipe left or right.

If you told 26-year-old me that I'd give a shit about someone's vaccination status, I wouldn't have been able to even comprehend what that even meant. But that is for better or worse, our reality right now, and frankly, I am exhausted.

I am not tired necessarily of being single, that's fine. I enjoy being able to do whatever want, whenever I want. I'm independent, so I don't mind being alone, but I am tired of going out with people only to find that there is no connection, no spark. Nothing. It's the ultimate let down when you start talking with someone over the casual drink and you slowly start to realize that you will never see this person again.

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