I've written a poem I'd like to share with you all. Clears throat. "Roses are red, ivy has vines, I think I want to marry these RHOBH taglines." Yep, I'd like to marry a 30-second promo clip in some strange TV wedding special that would probably air on TLC. I'd become The Girl Who Married A TV Show Snippet and it'd be worth it because the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 11 taglines are just that good.
I'll get right to it. You know the drama. You know the scandal. You know the headlines. What you don't know is how the women have chosen to introduce themselves for what is sure to be a very, very good season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. (Nowhere to go but up after last season, you know?)
Here's what we've got:
- Kyle Richards: "This town is a game of chess, but no one's taking this queen down."
- Lisa Rinna: "My lips are legendary... and they will never gloss over the truth."
- Garcelle Beauvais: "If you want a starring role in my life, you better drop the act."
- Dorit Kemsley: "Dress like there's no tomorrow. And then tomorrow, do it again!"
- Sutton Stracke: "Anyone who doubts my exquisite manners can kiss my exquisite derriére."
- Crystal Kung Minkoff: "Hollywood is full of pretenders, and I slay them all!"
- Erika Girardi: "The strongest substance on earth isn't diamonds. It's me."
And none for Kathy Hilton. (Who isn't featured... where you at Kath?)
Erika may be stronger than diamonds (an incredible nod to her previous tagline), but I'm as weak as the Lucy Lucy Apple Juice storyline. The references to other seasons (Rinna's lips! Erika's diamonds! The CROWN!), Sutton Stracke as a regular, Kyle's hair flip, it's just all too good. (Dorit's is kind of a throwaway, but honestly I'm here for the fashion and the fashion only, so I'm A-OK with it!)
What do you think of the newest taglines? Who is setting themselves up for a great season?
Images: Bravo