First of all, let me start by saying that The Housewife and The Hustler is an ABC News Production, which is the studio that gave Carole Radziwill her Emmy and gave us Peter Jennings and Good Morning America. It's prestigious television. But this documentary on Erika Jayne Girardi and her husband, Tom Girardi looks as if it's brought to us by – and I say this with love – Investigation Discovery.

When I tell you this documentary is art in the most low-brow of ways, I mean that with my whole heart. The documentary is beyond dramatic. It gives us interviews from the likes of Dana "Pam" Wilkey who had a very brief stint on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, podcast host Heather MacDonald, Tom's former legal consultant, Sunny Hostin from The View, and several of Tom's alleged victims.

It starts with a woman in an all white, Heather Locklear-style skirt slowly coming into focus as she sits down, and it's none other than Danielle "Beverly" Staub. Why is Bev here? (No clue.) What does she know? (Literally nothing.) Was she the only one that was available for this? (She and Wilkey!) Bev lives in New Jersey, what the fuck does she know about Erika and Tom's legal issues? (Literally nothing.)

And yet, she is the perfect person to comment on all of it because I mean, she did work with Erika on Watch What Happens Live "one or two times" and "didn't get the best vibe from her" and they both worked at the strip club Shakers (just, not at the same time). Wow, Beverly wow.