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Erika Jayne Is Giving Off Some Major Heidi Montag Vibes Here

- Real Housewives of Beverly Hills -
Erika Jayne Is Giving Off Some Major Heidi Montag Vibes Here

Erika Jayne was once described (by herself, but as Erika Girardi... ) as, "glitz, glamour, fantasy, love, escape" — the five touchstones of any person, really. But I've gotta say, these new photos of RHOBH's Erika Girardi picking up flowers outside her home are not glitz, glamour, fantasy, love, or escape. They are, however, very Heidi Montag circa 2008.

Ahead of Valentine's Day, the second most romantic holiday of the year — the first being National Break Up With Your Carrier Day, which also falls on Feb. 13 — Erika was photographed picking up a bucket of red roses outside her home that she reportedly moved into following her split from husband and lawyer Tom Girardi.

The Sun has all the photos for you to click through, but to sum them up: Erika is in a red silk (I'm sure) robe, has full hair and makeup done (confirming her glam team made the move with her, and are either still on payroll or working out of the goodness of their hearts), black fuzzy slippers on, and is making far too much eye contact with the photographers. So much so, you have to wonder how authentic these photos are. Very rarely does a celebrity bring a shit-eating grin to their front lawn while being photographed by paparazzi. (Especially when wearing a robe!) And very rarely does anyone look this happy in general... in this climate? What are you smiling about Erika! (And before you suggest she just knows how to play to the camera, I know that. Have you seen her almost get run over by a bicycle in Berlin? However, these photos vastly differ from other paparazzi shots of her. This smile is woman-in-a-tampon commercial happy.)

"Glitz, glamour, fantasy, love, escape."

I also can't help but notice the vase of the flowers is set to face the cameras very deliberately, making it easy to read that they're from Petals LA. Surely, you won't be too surprised to find out that Petals LA's Instagram page shared the shots too.

While I'm all for Erika getting some action — floral and otherwise — on Valentine's Day, it all feels... Heidi Montag. You remember, right? How in the late aughts Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were constantly photographed by the paparazzi in various staged situations for continued press? (A personal favorite is when Heidi was "caught" crying while standing next to a single chair placed on the sidewalk.) Spencer later explained that he and Heidi would make money — "50/50" — on the photos they staged after selling the photos to mostly British magazines. "We were making over a million dollars selling our paparazzi photos, so you start doing a lot of them and you're like, 'This is the best gig ever!'" he said in 2016.

Now, I'm not saying that's what's happening with Erika's photoshoot — but given the current financial debacle she and Tom are reportedly facing, I hope she's making some money off of these pictures. I want my Housewives to be rich — in culture, in conversation, but mostly in money. And if that means flashing some pearly whites while strategically showing off where you buy your roses from for the cameras, then so be it. I'd take that product plug over an anti-aging cream from Ramona Singer any day.

I just hope that Erika doesn't lose that glitz, glamour, fantasy, love, escape in a Carl's Jr. ad.

Images: John Tsiavis, Kathy Boos/Bravo

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