This One Goes Out To My Fellow Self-Aware Queens Who Need To Calm Down

- Hot Off The Mess -
This One Goes Out To My Fellow Self-Aware Queens Who Need To Calm Down

We’ve heard time and time again that self-awareness is key, but it wasn’t until a recent session with my therapist when I learned that yes, to some extent, self-awareness is very important, but on the other hand, staking your claim as a self-aware person can actually be a deflection that can stop you from growing. I – wow.

I know I'm not breaking any news when I say that going through a global pandemic, a lot of us didn’t come out the person we were going in. Twenty-twenty was the first time in a long time that I really got to sit with myself. Not to sound like a cheesy asshole, but I got to reflect.

And when one sits in silence, one is forced to examine how one’s parents did and did not fuck them up.

My parents are big advocates for therapy and they raised me to be radically aware. I was taught at a young age that my parents aren’t just Mom and Dad; they’re also Mary and Steve who have their own struggles, insecurities, and lives outside of me. Mary and Steve got divorced (officially) when I was in third grade and because I’d been raised to know they loved me, and weren’t (harmfully) dependent on each other, I was fine with their split.

I never was the kid who saw Parent Trap and thought it was a brilliant idea; I saw how fine Mary and Steve were being apart and to this day, they’re still close friends who often hangout (even without me). A lot of kids from divorced homes aren’t this lucky and I’m extremely grateful for the relationship I have with my parents and theirs with each other. Frankly, they're the shit.

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