Welcome to Retro Recaps, where we revisit your favorite old shows and give them the modern recap treatment they always deserved. Last time, we dove into Kell On Earth. Today, it's RHONY's "Scary Island" episode. Caution: snark ahead.

I can’t believe I missed the 10th anniversary of “Scary Island,” the troika of episodes of The Real Housewives of New York City that originally aired in May 2010. To my credit, and everyone else’s, we did have a lot going on last spring, but I can’t believe there weren’t countless odes and oral histories about perhaps the most famous episodes of the franchise that don’t include Teresa Giudice bellowing “prostitution whore” and ruining the wall-to-wall carpeting of the basement party room of a mediocre New Jersey eating establishment.

Since I missed the landmark anniversary, I thought it was time for a rewatch. Usually when fans talk about “Scary Island” they usually mean the eleventh, twelfth, and (unlucky) thirteenth episodes of the show’s monumental third season. The first of these episodes shows the girls on a night out aboard the yacht of the owner of Hooters, and Ramona Singer swishing while saying “Turtle Time.” The middle episode features Kelly Killoren Bensimon’s infamous candy-fueled breakdown, and the final one shows Jill Zarin arriving to surprise the rest of the women and being turned away at the door. Since Kelly falling apart is one of the series most iconic moments, I thought I would focus on that episode.