Every season, it seems that Chris Harrison is bragging about a new ~most dramatic ever~ moment in the Bachelor franchise — but what happens to the contestants who actually lived through them? I caught up with Bachelor Nation alum Olivia Caridi, who appeared on Ben Higgins’ season of the ABC show, to chat about one of the franchise’s iconic moments.

Back in 2016, the “Mouthing Off” podcast host was fighting against 27 other women for a chance to win the lead’s heart and find love during a whirlwind, reality TV adventure. She snagged not only the first impression rose, but also one of the first group date rose’s, securing her position as a front runner in the competition. However, her seemingly brash nature seemed to rub some of the other contestants the wrong way, and she was quickly labelled the “villain” of the season, especially after a few inconsiderate comments she went on to apologize for after the show.

Being cast as one of the season’s archetypal antagonists landed her a spot on one of the dreaded two-on-one dates with Emily Ferguson. The rivals enjoyed a contentious, pseudo-romantic date on a private island in the Bahamas as they both tried to plead their case. However, when Ben chose to pursue his relationship with Emily instead, Olivia was left behind on the beach. Literally.

Now, she’s sharing exactly what that was like.